Nice one matey.
Easter and Christmas cactus...survive all sorts of atmospheres from steamy to air conditioned, and seem to thrive on neglect. Then, when they flower, they are gorgeous for many weeks.
A Peace Lily is a good office plant as this removes pollution from the air. Https://www.smartgardenoffices.co.uk.
Me too need a plant in an office that does not require watering
All plants need water at some point. Perhaps an artificial plant would be your best bet
Heavens - they aren't even pretending are they ? No. 3 looks distinctly rude IMHO