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Mattock Club

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  • Goodness me, I am behind the times. Can mattocks be 3D printed? I imagine they would shatter at the first strike.
  • TheGreenManTheGreenMan Tyne and Wear Green Belt Posts: 880
    @CostumedVole

    I was thinking more of the lost/mangled body parts we’re bound to encounter but 3D printed mattocks would be a great idea for merch! 
  • That's definitely your wheelhouse. I'm the rule-maker, that's all. Talk about Mattock Club, and wear steel toed boots. My contribution done and dusted right there.
  • TheGreenManTheGreenMan Tyne and Wear Green Belt Posts: 880
    @CostumedVole

    You also bring the enthusiasm which, like a fine honey fungus, will infect most members. 

    Never underestimate your worth in GWFMC. 
  • FireFire LondonPosts: 12,242
    "You could probably print toes but bowels would be much more of a challenge."
    I will add that to my list of sentences I have never written before.
    Also, if you look the line up on Google, it will not be there.
  • ErgatesErgates Devon, east of ExeterPosts: 1,180
    Thank you for the warm welcome, GreenMan! I know they can 3D print ears, not sure about bowels. Might have to ask Pat E to knit me a length, should I need it. If I don’t fall on the mini mattock, the other concern is the secateurs in the apron pocket.....
    What might be good would be something like an archery quiver, so I can reach over my shoulder like Robin Hood ( or Maid Marian, - in my case, Old Maid Marian )
    Have been seriously considering putting a long cord on my red suede bramble gauntlets. I could hang them round my neck like we did with mittens when I was a child, so I have those handy as well, they are too big for the apron pockets.
    Ive just had a horrid image of myself being found in the garden, partially strangled and with severe abdominal injuries. The trouble is the garden is over an acre, and quite hilly, so it’s a real bore to have to come back to the house for tools. 
    The grandchildren bought me a personalised garden bag for Mother’s Day, I may have to cart that out with me.


  • B3B3 Posts: 20,024
    A word from the idle gardener. 
    How to do for a large old shrub
    Cut off branches leaving about 2-3 ft sticks for leverage
    Remove enough soil to expose the main roots
     Get a preferably overweight person .
     Wedge the mattock under the offending  shrub and then get the OP to stand on the handle.
    You can then saw at the roots. Be sure to get at the ones directly under the stump too.
    OP can assist by leaning against shrub to expose more roots
    Wield the sawn off stump with pride and then hide it in the bottom of the brown bin.
    If you are fussy, you can then lever out the remaining roots or you can risk leaving them to rot if you're lazy. ( the latter has worked for me )
    In London. Keen but lazy.
  • WonkyWombleWonkyWomble Posts: 3,882
    Just checking,  I've had a trapped nerve in my lower back,  now recovering but have been advised not to wield a Mattock for a month. 
    Do I get membership suspended? Or is declaring the status sufficient? 🤔
  • I had no idea there a mattock users club, is it a secret society where a funny handshake is required for membership ? :wink: 
    Yes, I'm afraid it is, but we're a fully inclusive club and open to all who a) have a mattock and b) are not afraid to use it.
  • FireFire LondonPosts: 12,242
    I don't have a mattock and am afraid to use it. I am an interloper. :s
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